


Believe

by Blackghost7



Category: NCIS
Genre: Getting Together, Insecurity, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-19
Updated: 2014-11-19
Packaged: 2018-02-26 07:45:43
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2643839
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blackghost7/pseuds/Blackghost7
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Our guys finally get together. But will they let their insecurities ruin their chance at happiness? In the end, Tony believes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Believe

It had been a rough case, as always when kids were involved. Gibbs had been expecting Tony to show up in his basement for some time now, and was starting to worry more and more about his SFA the longer it took for the younger man to show. When finally he heard the sound of his front door opening and the recognizable footfalls of his agent on the ground floor, it was several hours past the expected arrival time. Gibbs sighed a breath of relief, at the same time worried about the condition Tony would be in. He expected a very drunk DiNozzo to stumble down his stairs.

It was therefore a surprise when Tony sounded sure footed as he walked across the floor to the kitchen, where he obviously grabbed something from the fridge before returning through the living room to the basement stairs. Gibbs kept his eyes on the wood he was working on until Tony was seated in his usual place on the bottom steps, and only then did Gibbs glance over to the man. He could barely keep the surprise off his face at what he saw.

Tony was sharply dressed in black slacks and a black shirt, both obviously tailored. Black dress shoes and black socks completed the outfit. DiNozzo’s hair was styled a little wilder than he usually wore it at work, and for the first time Gibbs noticed that he must have been growing it longer again over the past few weeks. It looked more like it had in the beginning, almost twelve years ago when they had met, and seemed lighter; whether from the sun they’d had recently or from the delicate touch of his stylist, Gibbs couldn’t tell. He finally looked the younger man in the eye.

DiNozzo’s eyes were guarded, but he was very obviously sober. His hand contained not the expected beer bottle, but a soda he must have found somewhere in the back of the fridge, left over from Gibbs couldn’t remember when. Gibbs took in Tony’s form in the sharp clothes that suited him so well and surreptitiously sighed in appreciation. He had always admired the way his second looked, but had pushed it to the back of his mind every time he found himself looking. Tony was off limits. Gibbs turned back to his project and silence reigned.

“You OK, DiNozzo?”, Gibbs finally asked when the younger man did not seem inclined to speak. When no reply was forthcoming, Gibbs turned his head to his agent again and looked him straight in the eye. Tony was regarding him with an unusual expression on his face. Gibbs couldn’t tell what was going through the man’s mind, and he was normally so good at reading him. Then Tony’s expression turned to one of resolve as he looked back at Gibbs and he set down his untouched soda on the step beside him before getting up and walking towards Gibbs. Gibbs admired his graceful movements while the younger man strode over to him, grabbed a saw horse and drew it up close to Gibbs before sitting down, a leg on each side. He was close enough to touch Gibbs, and Gibbs felt his stomach tighten at Tony’s nearness.

“No Jethro, I am not OK. But I am hoping I will be,” Tony said softly. Gibbs startled at the use of his given name instead of the usual Gibbs or Boss, but liked it. He was worried though where this was going. Had he given something away and was Tony here to tell him off for it? Was Tony here to say goodbye? Had he let something slip?

Tony saw the apprehension in Gibbs’ eyes and felt his resolve waiver for a moment. Was he going to screw up his life with this one act of honesty after all these years? But he had decided this evening that he couldn’t take it anymore, he needed to do this, no matter what the consequences. Steeling himself he persevered.

“I was going to go out and get drunk and hopefully get laid, to get my mind off the case, but I found I didn’t want to. I wanted to be here instead.”  
“I’m fine, DiNozzo, you don’t need to worry about me” Gibbs interjected.  
“I wasn’t coming here to check on you, like I said, I wanted to be here. With you.” Tony let the silence set in for a moment while the two men stared at each other, trying to discern and convey the exact meaning of the words. “Tony..” Gibbs finally broke the silence after long moments and Tony felt his heart leap at the sound of his first name, which Gibbs so rarely used. Was this meaningful, or was he reading too much into it?

Gibbs cleared his throat and spoke softly: “I wanted you to be here too. I was waiting for you.”  
“To check up on me?”  
“To make sure you would be alright. And…”  
“And…?”  
“And because I wanted your company.”  
Tony could see this was quite an admission for Gibbs and he held his breath a moment before deciding to push it further.  
“My company? You just wanted me sitting here on your basement stairs in silence while you worked on whatever it is you are building now?”  
Gibbs searched Tony’s eyes for a moment before answering.  
“Not just that kind of company.”

Tony sucked in a breath, trying once again to gauge whether he really was reading the situation correctly, then decided he should stick to his resolve and follow through on the decision he had made earlier that evening; the decision that had him coming here instead of going out to find relief in something vacuous and empty as he had done so many times before. Time to face the music and see if they would dance.

“Me too, Jethro. I can’t do it anymore. I need you and nothing else will satisfy me. Please, Jethro, hold me? Touch me?” he asked, looking up at Gibbs through his eyelashes almost shyly.

Gibbs groaned and immediately reached out his hands, sliding one across Tony’s cheek and to the back of his neck, the other around Tony’s waist. He drew him closer but then paused, trying to make sure one last time that this was what Tony meant. Tony placed his hands on Gibbs’ knees and slowly slid them up each thigh until he reached Gibbs’ hips and grasped them, pulling the man closer to himself so their legs tangled. Then, his gaze fixed on Gibbs, he finally closed the distance between their lips and kissed his boss.

~~~~~

For long, long minutes the only sounds in the basement were the groans emanating from both men as they found their pleasure in their lips sliding over each other. Tongues tangled and gently fought for dominance while hands slid up and down all the parts of their bodies they could reach. Legs pushed against each other and were in the way as they tried to get closer together. Finally they came up for air, both men panting and chests heaving. Their eyes locked.

“If we do this, it will not be just once”, Gibbs warned Tony when they had both managed to catch their breath somewhat.  
“Never intended it to be a one off, Jethro”, Tony replied, “I’ve loved you for too long to risk everything for something casual.”  
“You love me?”  
“Only since forever.”  
That silenced the older man and Tony felt worry rising in his stomach again. Too much, too soon? But no, he had waited for years, so now it was all or nothing.

Gibbs considered the man he held close for a long moment and then started to smile. Tony was stunned, this was not a usual Gibbs smile, not one he had ever seen before. Then Gibbs kissed him fiercely before releasing Tony’s lips and muttering: “I’m a damn fool.”  
“What was that, Jethro?” Tony asked.  
“I am a fool, Tony, an old damn fool. I could have loved you for so long, but I didn’t think you…” Gibbs trailed off.  
“What are you saying, Jethro? You didn’t think I’d what?”  
After another long silence, when Tony was just about to speak, Gibbs finally admitted: “Didn’t think you could ever be interested in me. Didn’t know you were interested in men, let alone bastards.”  
Tony’s face lit up with a huge grin when he understood what it was Gibbs was saying.  
“Not interested in men, Jethro, just in you, bastard and all. You’re it for me. Have been for years.”  
Gibbs felt an unusual surge of emotion and had to look away for a moment.  
“Don’t,” Tony said. “Don’t hide from me now. Show me how you feel.”  
“Not easy, Tony. Been a long time since anything like this ever happened to me. Gotta take it slow.”  
“OK, Jethro, slow on the emotions. But please tell me we don’t have to be slow with everything?”  
Gibbs looked at Tony again and saw the impish grin he had heard in Tony’s voice at that last question.  
“Hell no,” Gibbs replied and with that he hauled Tony to his feet and all but dragged him up the stairs, out of the basement and to the bedroom.

~~~~~

The hurry Gibbs had displayed in dragging Tony upstairs disappeared once they had reached the bedroom. Gibbs left Tony standing at the end of the bed while he moved to the nightstand to turn on the lamp so that a soft light lit the room, enough for them to see by. He looked at Tony then and took in the graceful lines and hard muscles displayed under the clothes he’d admired earlier that evening. Tony knew he looked good, but it was somewhat unsettling to be on the receiving end of such a stare from his boss, simply because even though he had decided that he would take action this evening after all these years of yearning, he still could not really believe that this was truly happening. Gibbs noticed him starting to fidget and become uneasy and quickly crossed the room to take the younger man in his arms.

“Please don’t,” Gibbs said. “Just admiring the view. And trying to convince myself that you’re really here and we’re really doing this.”  
At hearing his own thoughts being repeated to him, Tony couldn’t help but let out a small laugh. OK, it was a nervous giggle. Gibbs’ eyes lit up in amusement and he pressed his still smiling lips to Tony’s again. This kiss was soft and exploring, but gradually grew in intensity as both men relaxed in the knowledge that the other was really there and that this was really happening. Soon hands were caressing everything they could reach and lips and tongues were dueling in pursuit of pleasure. When Tony finally slid his hands down to grasp Gibbs’ ass and pulled them against each other so their entire bodies pressed together, Gibbs’ soft moans turned into a deep growl. Tony gasped for breath as he felt the sound reverberate through his chest and straight to his groin. His already hard cock stood at attention just a little more and Gibbs felt it press against his own.

Suddenly desperate to feel skin on skin, Tony pulled back and grabbed the bottom of Gibbs’ sweater, trying to yank it off urgently. Gibbs, feeling the same way, obliged by raising his arms and as soon as the sweater was out of the way reached his hands out to tackle the task of unbuttoning Tony’s shirt. It was made more difficult by Tony’s need to caress Gibbs’ chest and back, sucking lightly on Gibbs’ neck all the while, but finally the task was done and Gibbs pulled back and slowly but reverently slid the shirt off Tony’s shoulders, kissing each inch of exposed skin, sliding his hands over the expanse of Tony’s chest and stomach and reveling in the feel of Tony’s muscles twitching under his touch.

A deep groan escaped Tony’s lips at the feel of those lips and hands on his skin. For a moment he stood still relishing the contact, then urgency once again took over and he reached for Gibbs’ sweats, pushing them down together with his boxers, going down with them as he slid them over Gibbs’ legs to his feet, kissing his way down Gibbs’ chest. Gibbs stepped out of his clothes, looking down at Tony now sitting on his knees in front of him, and the thought of what Tony could do there made his cock twitch. The movement caught Tony’s eye and he looked at the delectable flesh exposed right in front of his face, before looking up at his boss and smiling a devilish grin. In one quick move, he brought his mouth down and swallowed as much of Gibbs as he could. Then he started gently sucking and licking, bringing his hands back up Gibbs’ legs until they reached his hips, moving his nimble fingers over the other man, playing with his balls and caressing his ass, while keeping the pressure of his tongue and lips on his cock.

Gibbs slid one hand into Tony’s hair, needing to have a hold on something to steady himself, let his head fall back and his eyes slip closed under the onslaught on his senses. He tried to keep his hips still, not wanting to hurt Tony, but after only a minute it became too much and he pulled Tony’s head back by his hair and almost yelled: “Tony, stop!”  
Tony froze, afraid that he had done something wrong, that the older man had changed his mind. He looked up with a guarded expression. Gibbs, panting harshly trying to contain himself, remained with eyes closed for a moment until he sensed the change in the younger man’s posture. His eyes flashed open and down towards Tony. As soon as he saw the hurt expression on Tony’s face, he realized what had happened and what the other man must think. He let go of Tony’s hair and kneeled down in front of him, grabbing his torso and pulling him tight against himself while kissing his face and then his lips deeply. Tony took a few moments to respond, and only when they were once again seemingly on the same page, did Gibbs release his lips and open his eyes to look at his lover.

“Tony,” he said softly, willing Tony to open his eyes and look at him in return. “Tony, not what you think. I didn’t change my mind. You were giving me so much pleasure I was too close to it being over already. And I want this to be special, not over in a minute. You deserve so much more than that.”  
Finally Tony looked him in the eye and saw the truth there. His smile still showed signs of being unsure, but he did believe Gibbs. Reaching out to hold the older man, he started kissing him again to reassure himself this was still happening. Gibbs’ hands then moved to Tony’s slacks and opened them in order to get the younger man as naked as he himself was. He palmed Tony’s erection while working on his pants and was rewarded with deep moans which he swallowed with his kisses. He deliberately took his time, playing with Tony until he could feel the man tremble. Once the zip was released, he stood up and dragged Tony with him, Tony obligingly stepping out of the remainder of his clothes.

Gibbs guided them to the bed and gently pushed Tony down on it, all the while kissing and caressing his lover, Tony giving back as good as he got. Gibbs molded his body to Tony’s, lying on top of him and relishing the feel of Tony’s flushed skin everywhere he could reach. Tony in turn slid his hands over Gibbs’ back and ass, loving the feel of the older man’s weight on him, pinning him down to the bed. Then, needing more, Tony rolled them over until they were lying on their sides, so he could reach out and grasp Gibbs’ hard cock again, eliciting a deep moan from the man when he ran his fingers over it and spread the leaking moisture from the top over his hands to help with the friction. Gibbs reciprocated passionately.

“How do you want to do this, Tony?” Gibbs asked after a few more delectable minutes spent in this position. “What do you want?”  
“I want you in me, I need to feel you in me,” Tony responded almost desperately.  
Gibbs had not considered the possibility of them doing that their first time, and the thought of it got him even harder than he already had been. Groaning in pleasure at the mere thought of burying himself in the beautiful man, he took a deep breath in an effort to steady himself before disentangling his arms from Tony and reaching to the bedside table, quickly rummaging around to find the lube.  
“You ever done this before?” he asked Tony huskily, while spreading the lube over his fingers.  
“No, but I’ve done some backdoor play. You?”  
“Long time ago, Tony. I won’t hurt you, I’ll make you feel so good…”  
“Already are, Jethro. Please…”

And with that, Gibbs reached down and quickly found what he was looking for, sliding his slicked fingers over the ring of muscle, feeling it twitch, before gently sliding one finger inside. A deep moan which could have been Jethro’s name escaped from Tony’s lips as he writhed on the bed with the feeling of Gibbs’ finger inside him. When Gibbs started moving, gently pushing in and pulling back out again, Tony’s breath hitched and he struggled to control his breathing. Feeling Tony loosen up, Gibbs added a second finger, hooking them inside him in search of his sweet spot. Suddenly Tony gasped and strained off the bed, letting Gibbs know he had found what he was looking for. Wanting to make this so good for Tony, the older man made sure to hit the spot again and again as he loosened his lover further before slipping a third finger in. Tony groaned at the stretch, feeling a slight burning sensation, but that was drowned out in the pleasure of all the other feelings those fingers were giving him. Then Gibbs grasped his cock and started slowly pulling it while thrusting with his fingers. Tony couldn’t form a coherent thought anymore and, reduced to a quivering heap of pleasure, could only beg. “Please, Jethro, please please please…”

Feeling that his lover was ready, Gibbs removed his fingers and quickly wiped them on the sheets. Tony keened at the loss of the fingers, but obligingly rolled onto his back, raising his hips when Gibbs pulled a pillow under them and spread his legs further to grant his lover access. Gibbs sat between his legs and pulled his hips towards him, lining up his cock and slowly pushing in. Head thrown back, eyes closed, Tony was the very picture of debauchery. Gibbs enjoyed the sight of his beautiful lover for a moment before pushing in a little further and calling Tony’s attention to him: “Tony, look at me. I need you to look at me.”  
With difficulty, the younger man managed to open his eyes and look up at his lover. “Tell me if it hurts, Tony,” Gibbs said, wanting to make sure his lover was alright.  
“Feels so good, Jethro. Please, more!” was all Tony could beg. And with that, Gibbs slid home.

Waiting a few moments to make sure Tony was okay, Gibbs admired the sight of pure wantonness the younger man presented. Before long, Tony started moving his hips against Gibbs, begging him wordlessly to start moving. Naturally Gibbs obliged, keeping his movements slow and steady for as long as he could, searching for and finding Tony’s sweet spot again. When he stroked just right, Tony’s body arched off the mattress and a stream of babbles escaped his lips. That sent Gibbs nearly over the edge, and he grasped Tony’s cock, starting to stroke it in time with his thrusts to bring Tony over the edge. It didn’t take long. A scream of pleasure was torn from Tony’s lips as he came hard and splattered their stomachs and chests with long ropes of come. His muscles clenching around Gibbs set the older man’s orgasm off as well and he groaned loudly as he coated Tony’s insides. He stayed upright for only a moment before collapsing on his younger lover’s chest.

~~~~~

When Tony woke up (or rather, regained consciousness, if he was honest with himself), he was lying on his back with Gibbs plastered to his side, Gibbs’ arm thrown over his chest and their legs tangled together. He could feel Gibbs breathing against his neck and felt boneless and fantastic. He had made love with Gibbs… Jethro! He felt amazing.

And then, wariness set in. They had made a confession to each other and it had led to being physical, very physical. He couldn’t help a broad smile at the memory of what they had done. But they hadn’t really talked. Gibbs hadn’t wanted to share his feelings, and now Tony was once again unsure of what this actually was. He had said that he loved Gibbs, but Gibbs hadn’t said it back. Not that he had expected that, but Tony’s insecurities were gnawing at him now that his mind was given a moment to wander. He knew he shouldn’t let his thoughts cloud the wonderful feelings he had, but it was difficult to refrain from going over the little conversation they had had last night. Gibbs had not spoken his feelings and had said to take it slow. But had they ruined it by jumping into bed together before they were both clear on what was at the heart of this?

Suddenly a hand reached up and slapped the side of his head – the back of his head was unreachable for the moment. Without even opening his eyes, Gibbs mumbled gruffly: “Stop thinking so loudly,” and tightened his hold on Tony’s chest. Tony couldn’t suppress a smile at that, but his worries were not abated by the fond gesture. Gibbs felt the tension in his younger lover beneath him and made a conscious effort to wake up.

Moments later Gibbs was awake and sat up, after placing a soft kiss on Tony’s lips. Tony looked at him, searching his face for clues. “Coffee,” Gibbs growled and started to move.  
“It’s three thirty in the morning,” Tony stated after looking at the alarm clock sitting on the bedside table.  
“Fine,” Gibbs responded, “bourbon then. Bathroom first.” And without looking back at his lover, got up and moved to the bathroom where he quickly relieved himself and cleaned himself up. Unsure, Tony waited until Gibbs returned from the bathroom, grabbed his sweats to pull on and made his way downstairs. Only then did Tony follow suit, pulling on his slacks and shirt in lieu of other clothes, leaving the shirt unbuttoned. Reaching the living room, he saw that Gibbs had grabbed a bottle of bourbon and two glasses and was sitting on the couch pouring drinks for them both. Uncertain, Tony sat down beside the man, making sure he did not sit too close. Long moments of silence followed as they both grabbed a glass and took a few sips.

“I guess we need to talk,” they both said at the same time.

~~~~~

They looked at each other, Gibbs with a smirk and Tony with a sheepish smile. Upon seeing the insecurity on Tony’s face, Gibbs frowned. He realized that things needed to be said, but he had thought that he had made it clear to his agent – his lover – that this was something he had wanted for a long time, something special that he treasured. Now he wasn’t so sure the younger man knew what Gibbs had meant. He abhorred talking about his feelings, the thought alone making his insides clench and his jaw lock tightly shut, but he knew he would have to let something out if he wanted to preserve the relationship they had just started. At least, to him this was the start of a relationship, and he needed to make sure Tony saw it the same way.

“Tony,” he said softly.  
“Yeah, Gibbs?” came Tony’s reply.  
Hmmm, Gibbs instead of Jethro. Damn, he was indeed an old fool. Tony was clearly worried and uncertain of what had happened if he was calling him Gibbs again. This was going to be painful, but it was too important to dismiss because he didn’t want to talk about his feelings.

“Tony,” Gibbs started again, “that was amazing. I can’t remember the last time I felt so good.” A soft smile appeared on Tony’s face, but apprehension was very clear in his eyes. This was definitely not going to be resolved easily. Gibbs sighed.  
“I meant what I said earlier. I am an old fool and you know I don’t talk about my feelings.” Gibbs took another sip of his bourbon, Tony mimicking the action while keeping silently waiting for more. “But… you are very important to me, Tony. I have wanted you for a long time… but I didn’t know how you felt or how you regarded me. What you said this evening, I couldn’t believe – I still can’t believe that you would want me. I’m older than you, you’re my second in command, you date women and you’re out of my league. How can you possibly want me?”  
Gibbs made sure his own insecurity was shining through in his words.

Tony gazed at him, taking yet another sip of the bourbon. Then he started to laugh softly.  
Gibbs was hurt at this reaction. He finally talked about his feelings and the reaction was laughter? This was not boding well. He glared at his lover.

“Don’t glare at me, Jethro!” Tony finally replied. “I’m only laughing because you’re expressing my feelings exactly. You’re a silver fox, sexy as hell, my Boss and mentor and have been married four times. I’m not a red head, not a woman and not at all what you seem to have been looking for. I can’t believe you could possibly be interested in me. But I’ve been in love with you since the day we met, and yesterday I decided that since you’re it for me, I’d better do something about it, even though I ‘d be risking our friendship and my job. I’m never going to be happy without you, so here I am. I love you.”

The two men gazed at each other and then smiled. Taking another sip of bourbon, Gibbs let Tony’s words find their way to his heart. Then he put his glass down on the table, and reached out his hand to caress Tony’s chest under his unbuttoned shirt, turning towards the younger man so he could reach the beautiful expanse of skin better. Leaning forward, he moved Tony’s shirt aside and pressed his lips to Tony’s heart, mumbling just loud enough for Tony to hear: “I love you too.” And with that the dam broke. Tony got rid of his glass as well, pulling Gibbs close to him and devouring his mouth in an intense kiss. Hands grasped and pulled their bodies together as closely as they could get, lips locking and tongues caressing, moans mingling with each other and being swallowed up in kisses. Both men quickly grew hard again, and feeling their cocks press against each other, made short work of ridding the clothes that were in the way before palming the other’s hardened flesh. They frantically rutted against each other seeking blissful release, finding it only short moments later, emotions racing through their beings.

Panting until they regained a semblance of equilibrium, they lay against each other, then started laughing.  
“Come,” Gibbs said smiling, rising to his feet, “back to bed with you”.

~~~~~

In the morning they woke up entangled together, and quickly resumed their play finding another release. This time it was slow and languorous, finding each hot spot on the other’s body and making good use of them, caressing and kissing every inch of skin they could reach. Tony this time was on the receiving end of Gibbs’ mouth and tongue before being taken again slowly and deeply, still stretched and sensitive from the previous night. It was perfect.

After showering together, Tony borrowed some sweats from Gibbs before heading downstairs for breakfast. In the kitchen they worked as well together as they did in the office, instinctively knowing where the other was and where he would be, so they never got in the way of each other. Breakfast and coffee consumed, they headed to the couch and spent the morning exploring each other in between talking and watching television. It was relaxed and easy and they both started to believe it was real. In the afternoon, Tony went to his apartment to get some clothes and returned to Gibbs’ in time for dinner and more lovemaking. Sunday was spent in much the same way. But that evening, Gibbs sensed Tony becoming tense again.

They were in the basement, Gibbs working on his project and Tony sitting on the saw horse nearby, beer in hand, when Gibbs noticed Tony started fidgeting. Where normally Tony would be talking a mile a minute, he was now quiet and seemed subdued.

“What’s wrong, Tony,” Gibbs finally asked.  
After a few moments’ silence, Tony responded: “What’s gonna happen tomorrow?”  
“What do you mean?”  
“When we’re back in the office. What’re we gonna do? And tomorrow evening? What’ll we do then?”  
Gibbs sighed. He should have brought this up before, but he hadn’t wanted to think about it and ruin their perfect weekend. He should have known that Tony would get anxious about it and should have headed it off at the pass.  
“The office is the office, Tony. I’ll be Gibbs and you’ll be DiNozzo. We’ll work the case if one comes up and I’ll be your boss. Tomorrow evening, we’ll see what we wanna do. Go home, alone or together. We’ll play it by ear, but keep it out of the office.”  
“So… you don’t want anyone to know.”  
“Do you? It’s still very new. Would it be wise to share this with the team already?”  
“I don’t know. I guess not. Would we ever tell them?”  
“I’m your boss, Tony, you’re my subordinate. There’s Rule 12. Don’t think it would be a smart move.”  
Tony’s eyes darkened for a moment, but then he agreed: “OK, Jethro.”

~~~~~

They spent the night together and early in the morning Tony drove to his apartment to shower and change his clothes and get ready for the work day. He reached the office shortly after Gibbs. McGee and Bishop weren’t there yet, and Tony was curious to see how Gibbs would react to his greeting of “Morning, Boss.” A short “DiNozzo” was his only reply and the two settled at their desks and started the day. Half way through the morning a case was called in and Tony was dismayed and hurt when Gibbs called for McGee and Bishop to grab their gear, leaving Tony behind at the office to finish his report on their previous case and, if time allowed, start research on the current one. The case turned out to be a bust and within the course of the afternoon it was settled. Tony couldn’t keep the hurt out of his eyes when McGee and Bishop were sent home immediately upon delivering their reports to Gibbs and Tony was sent on a coffee run while Gibbs waited to be called into MTAC. Gibbs was treating him like a probie instead of an SFA and Tony had expected better.

When some time later Gibbs finally shut down his computer, the call to MTAC having been cancelled last minute, he looked at DiNozzo and asked him brusquely: “Steak, DiNozzo?”, Tony really wanted to decline. It had all clearly been a mistake. What had made Gibbs react the way he had today? Did he really think Tony was just going to take this treatment and then jump into Gibbs’ bed in the evening? Tony responded sullenly that he had some things to finish and would be probably be by later. Gibbs raised an eyebrow, but did not respond as he turned and left the office.

Tony sat behind his desk contemplating the day, trying to figure out what had happened. He couldn’t figure out what had possessed Gibbs to treat him this way after the weekend they had just spent together. Why wouldn’t Gibbs want him on his six while out in the field? Was this his way of saying it had all been a mistake? But then why would he still want Tony over for dinner? Or was that just to tell him without witnesses present that Tony should start packing and looking for another job? Gibbs had said to keep it out of the office after all, so if there were to be ramifications, he would probably want to take care of those outside the office as well. Confused and sad, Tony left the office for his apartment.

Once there, Tony wandered around aimlessly, moving to the kitchen and checking the fridge, but then deciding against something to drink. He went to the bathroom to freshen up, then to the bedroom to change his clothes, ultimately deciding against that as well. Finally frustrated with himself and his churning thoughts, he slammed his wardrobe door closed, moved towards the door grabbing his keys and stalked to his car. When he found himself in Gibbs’ driveway, he couldn’t really remember the ride over, his thoughts still whirling in all directions. He took a moment to try and settle himself, then got out and quietly went inside the house.

Expecting to find Gibbs in the basement, Tony was surprised to see his boss sitting on the couch in the living room, half empty glass of bourbon in hand. His shoulders were hunched and he was staring down at his hands. It wasn’t until Tony cleared his throat that Gibbs looked up and at the other man. Relief flickered in his eyes for a moment before he guarded his expression again. He watched Tony move over to him and settle on the couch beside him, an uncomfortable distance away, as far as the piece of furniture would allow. They sat there in silence for a few moments, then Gibbs finally spoke.  
“What happened, Tony?”  
No response from the younger man.  
“I do something wrong?” Gibbs asked.  
Again no response. But Gibbs knew he could wait the other man out, and after long minutes Tony started speaking, softly but with a tinge of anger in his voice. “You change your mind? Gonna send me packing? Decided it was a mistake after all?”  
Gibbs was stunned. He must have really messed something up, but no matter how much he had gone over the day in his mind, he couldn’t figure out what it was.  
“What makes you think that?”  
“You treating me like a probie instead of your second in command!”  
Again, Gibbs was at a loss. “Explain.”  
The anger was more pronounced now, but mingled this time with disappointment and sadness. “Leaving me at the office instead of having me be at your six in the field! Sending me for coffee!”  
At last Gibbs started to see how his actions must have looked to Tony. Even though he knew this was serious, he couldn’t help a little chuckle escaping his lips at the realization that even though they were capable of having entire conversations at work without saying a word, this skill obviously did not extend to their personal lives. At the chuckle, Tony turned to Gibbs and barked: “What?!”

Gibbs smiled at the younger man while settling his glass on the side table, then reached out his hand to stroke Tony’s cheek fondly before delivering a soft head slap. Tony’s expression turned indignant and Gibbs quickly started speaking before Tony could flare up further.  
“Had a gut feeling about the case called in today. Vance alerted us similar bogus calls had been made to other NCIS offices, but we still had to check it out. Wanted you to stay behind to finish your report so we could have the entire evening together. When I still didn’t have your report at the end of the day, figured you needed some coffee to help you focus. Couldn’t get it for you myself because of the expected call to MTAC.”

Tony was silent as he weighed Gibbs’ words. It was actually plausible. Besides, when had Gibbs ever lied to him? Been sparse with the truth maybe, but never outright lied. Tony considered it for another moment, then a small smile appeared on his lips. “Really?”  
“Really.” Gibbs looked straight at him to ensure he saw the truth in his eyes.  
Tony’s smile grew a little further. “You wanted to spend the entire evening with me?”  
“Very much.”  
“Any particular activities you had in mind?” Tony’s smile now turned lascivious.  
And at that, Gibbs surged forward and plastered his lips to Tony’s.

~~~~~

The two men lay tangled together on the couch kissing and caressing each other for more than half an hour before Tony’s stomach rumbling loudly made them both grin and pull apart.  
“You promised me steak, if I recall correctly,” Tony said, patting his grumbling belly.  
Gibbs’ eyes twinkled as he smiled at the other man, then he extricated himself from their tangle of limbs, got up and reached out a hand to pull Tony off the couch and to the kitchen, holding that hand tightly on their way through the house. Once in the kitchen he used his free hand to grab a tray holding the steaks from the fridge, nudged the fridge door closed with his hip and dragged Tony back to the living room and the flickering fireplace. Tony laughed. “Giving me the grand tour, Jethro?”  
“Wasn’t planning on letting you go any time soon. You get strange ideas in your head when I’m not holding you.”  
Tony acknowledged Gibbs might have a point, and happily held on to his hand, intertwining their fingers and settling next to Gibbs in front of the fire. Grilling steaks one handed proved to be a bit of a challenge, but Gibbs managed, especially when Tony started assisting using his own free hand. While the steaks were on the fire, another joint trip was made to the kitchen to get plates, then another to get the beers they had gone without before. Steaks done, they sat back on the couch together with Gibbs still unwilling to let Tony go. He looked from the plates to Tony and back and forth once more, then asked: “Can you eat that by yourself without getting strange ideas again, or do I need to cut it up and feed it to you?”  
Tony’s smile was impish as he considered being fed, then turned serious. He leaned forward to kiss Gibbs softly on the lips before saying softly: “I’ll be alright. Thank you, Jethro.”  
They ate in silence, but kept their legs pressed against each other to maintain contact just in case.

~~~~~

Growling stomachs fed and plates cleared, they returned to the couch with more beers and sat down again. After clinking their bottles and taking a long draught, Tony cleared his throat and spoke softly: “I promise I won’t jump to conclusions like that again, Jethro. It’s just…”  
“It’s just what?” Gibbs asked when nothing further was forthcoming.  
“I can believe this is real when I’m with you, but… when you’re not right there touching me, I can’t help but doubt myself. Think I was just dreaming.”  
A soft snort escaped Gibbs’ lips. “Feel like I’m dreaming when I AM touching you, Tony. This could be a problem.” Gibbs’ eyes twinkled as he said it.  
Tony laughed. Gibbs turned serious. “Why do you doubt this, us?”  
“Because… I guess… no one has ever loved me, so why would you?”  
Gibbs felt his anger rise at that statement from his lover, knowing that the man’s father was mainly to blame for that. Next time Senior came to town, Gibbs would have serious words with the man. But that didn’t help him now.  
“I love you because you’re smart and funny and beautiful. You’re a hell of a good agent and a compassionate human being. You’re kind and good and brave and I trust you more than anyone in the world. I love you because… I just love you, Tony. I love you.” And with that, he kissed his younger lover deeply to convey the truth of his words.

Tony’s eyelids closed when Gibbs landed the kiss on him, and with that the moisture that had gathered in his eyes while the older man had spoken, ran down his cheeks. When Gibbs pulled back from the kiss, he saw the tears and gently wiped them away with his thumbs. “Don’t cry, my love, please…”  
And then Tony’s face lit up with a brilliant smile that made his eyes twinkle and spark. “I’m crying because I’m happy, Jethro. I love you.”

~~~~~

And from that moment on, they were really together. It wasn’t long before Tony moved in with Gibbs, most of his stuff already having made it to Gibbs’ house before they officially acknowledged to each other that they were living together. They took their time letting their relationship grow further and only when they were completely secure, did they let the team know. No one was surprised and McGee won the pool.

They had their ups and downs of course, and sometimes they were mad at each other or hurt each other. But they always worked it out together and Gibbs told Tony he loved him every chance he got. Eventually he got his reward when upon his “I love you”, Tony replied: “I believe you, Jethro.”


End file.
